29 People Who Are Just As Useless At Flirting As You


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Memes, fingers down. I am socially awkward AF, however I handle to bag ’em with my wonderful style in memes.

—Nicole Bryant-Bey, Fb


I get drunk, hook up with them, and hope for one of the best. ¯_(ツ)_/¯



I flirt by stealing meals. Like a french fry right here and there. I’ve acquired a number of demise threats, so I have to get a brand new technique quickly.



My flirting technique was at all times to search out the Goodreads of the lady I had emotions for after which learn a few of her favourite books or put up about studying them, hoping she’d speak to me about them. This has actually by no means labored, and the truth that I’m now not single is frequently surprising to me.



I at all times begin with sarcasm. If they do not get that, they will not get me, and in the event that they do get it, all the things else will circulate like honey 😉



My flirting often consists of awkward giggles and shy smiles.



My go-to flirting fashion can be telepathy. First, I get all nervous and discover it troublesome, if not inconceivable, to speak to the flirtee. That’s after I launch the telepathy offensive and ship 1,000,000 messages in my thoughts to the flirtee, making an attempt to get them to make the primary transfer and ask me out. Sometimes I’ll mix it with some critical eye contact, which in all probability simply comes throughout as creepy. I’m 41 and I can inform you that this flirting fashion has a hit charge of precisely zero%.



The primary week into my first semester at school, we have been doing an exercise to get to know our classmates. This man was flirting so much with me and finally instructed me he would see me the following class. In response, I turned to him and screamed on the high of my lungs, “WELL YOU’LL BE HERE AND I’LL BE HERE SO WE WILL BOTH BE HERE,” and I turned and ran out of the room.

He dropped the category that week.



I am a kind of “if you have a look at me, I look away” sorts. And I typically stare. God, I want I used to be higher at flirting. #SingleForever



I used to be at a espresso store with my dad and “uncle” (his BFF), and I assumed the barista was actually cute. So after I instructed her my order, I simply leaned over and requested her, “How previous are you and are you homosexual?” She mentioned 18 and no, then proceeded to chortle. However she then began hitting on my uncle who flirted again a bit. My father and uncle laughed at me after we left. For sure, simple could not at all times be greatest.



Self-deprecating humor, sweating so much, and a barrage of pop-culture references. I am married so it labored at the least a pair instances, however man, I would not flaunt it as a flirting fashion anybody ought to attempt.

—Molly Jane Sisson, Fb


I’m extra of a “put on a Star Wars shirt and hope they’re carrying a Star Wars shirt too” form of gal. It makes me really feel like we now have some form of bizarre connection — possibly, form of.



Regular folks flirting: Do you take heed to hip-hop?

Me flirting: Do you cry within the bathe to drown out your tears?



I “flirted” with my boyfriend earlier than we even met by liking his Instagram footage.



My go-to flirting approach is at all times to tease guys. It provides me a superb sense of whether or not or not we’ll work. Like, can we joke round with one another?



Eye contact. That is all it takes. You make eye contact, linger only a liiiiittle too lengthy, and that is all it takes to inform somebody you are . Generally you may add a smirk or the fast look-away for added impact. It has been my transfer for 10 years working now. A traditional.



I flirt just about fully by controlling how a lot consideration I give them. Have a pal, or another person you are chatting with, and preserve most of your consideration on that pal, after which all of a sudden say one thing to the thing of your affection. On the identical time, make direct eye contact, and smile vast and real. Proceed to provide and take consideration like that, based mostly off of whether or not or not they reply to it the primary time or two.



My favourite transfer was at bars in faculty. I’d stroll as much as somebody I assumed was cute and say that they regarded acquainted, like possibly we had a category collectively, or they labored on the native mall too. With out really making an attempt, we might each attempt to determine the place we knew one another from, despite the fact that we have been full strangers. Labored each time.



If I used to be assembly somebody at a celebration or hanging out, I’d slowly transfer nearer to them. I’d at all times lean nearer when speaking, too. And in the event that they have been sitting on a sofa, I’d sit on the arm of the sofa and put my arm on the again of the sofa behind them and slowly lean nearer by the night time. Nearly at all times labored for me.



I am tremendous into astrology so I prefer to learn a man’s astrological start charts and discover out his emotional baggage and the way he works. If he is actually good-looking, I will learn his tarot playing cards or give him a very nice arm therapeutic massage.

—Gucio Marcin Jim Powęska, Fb


If you’re ever speaking to somebody over Fb/Instagram/Twitter/Snapchat DMs and wish to change it over to texting so it is extra legit, say, “That is killing all my information, what’s your quantity?” ALWAYS works.



I do not flirt. Individuals flirt with me.

—Kevin Hou, Fb

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