GLUM fans but glam Wags.
While Arsenal and Chelsea supporters are going to hell and Baku to pay for tickets and journey to the Europa League final in the Azerbaijan capital, the players’ wives and girlfriends are travelling in luxury.
It’s the beauties and the east as the footballers’ partners visit the former Soviet Union country for the conclusion of a tournament neither club wanted to qualify for, in a place none of their fans wanted to go to… but which both teams are now desperate to win.
Whoever triumphs will only scoop around £3.5million – hardly a life-changing, Wags-to-riches amount as it is only about three months’ pay for Gunners playmaker Mesut Ozil or four month’s wages for Eden Hazard’s wizardry.
But victory for Unai Emery would mean silverware in his first season as Gunners boss – after predecessor Arsene Wenger was trophy-less in Europe during his 22-year reign.
And if Maurizio Sarri lifts the cup in his debut season with Chelsea it would surely confirm his impressive turnaround – from critics sniping at Sarri-ball to a satisfactory “double” of third place in the Premier League and Europa League joy.
Whatever happens, players of both teams already have one guaranteed consolation – stunning Wags who might even get more attention than usual as Wednesday’s showpiece at the Olympic Stadium is attracting relatively few fans.
Only around 6,000 Arsenal and Chelsea followers are expected combined – less than ten per cent of the capacity.
For Gunners defender Shkodran Mustafi, victory would help ease the frustration of another mediocre season where he has been far from a model performer – unlike wife Vjosa Kaba.
Albanian model Vjosa married the German, 27, in Macedonia over the summer of 2016 – the same season he switched from Valencia to Arsenal.
And while Mustafi has been a mis-fit, team-mate Petr Cech has a fit missus – because wife Martina is a personal trainer.
Keeper Cech, who married his high-school sweetheart in 2003, is quitting as a player after Wednesday, with a return to opponents and former club Chelsea as a director highly possible.
Another happily-married Gunner is Swiss midfielder Granit Xhaka, who tied the knot with Kosovo-Albanian Leonita Lekaj in 2017 after two years of dating.
And another new Wag on the Emirates scene, Lucas Torreira’s girlfriend Vittoria Repetto, is an Instagram sensation with her penchant for minimal clothing.
But Vittoria trails behind Ozil’s partner Amine Gulse for social media adulation.
The 25-year-old was crowned Miss Turkey in 2014 – and the couple recently feathered their nest by adopting… a French bulldog puppy.
Over at Stamford Bridge, experienced centre-backs David Luiz (dating Sara Madeira) and outgoing Gary Cahill (married to Gemma Acton) keep their private life… private.
But Davide Zappacosta’s girlfriend Morena Urzini has regularly been snapped in stunning swim costumes.
And Ross Barkley’s flame-haired partner Zoe Riozzi is known for a down-to-earth, “girl next door” lifestyle far removed from the stereotypical image of Premier League Wags.
Midfield creator Willian has not been shy with posh, posy pics on social media with his lawyer wife Vanessa Martins.
And exotic Isadora Nascimento has admitted she gets “very strong, crazy” when she goes to watch her Italian full-back boyfriend Emerson play.
So if Chelsea’s adventure in deepest Azerbaijan turns into the Italian Sob for Sarri and Emerson, at least the latter could not have chosen a nicer shoulder to cry on.